Sharing Sakura
by poetryismyfirstlove
Summary: Modern AU. Life always strikes a balance. I always thought that it was about good and bad. But now I think I understand it better. I felt a tilt in the balance between Naruto, Sakura and I. For life to be fair to someone, it has to be unfair to another.
1. How it all started that summer

A/N: This story was loosely based on the book by Katherine Applegate. Naruto, Sakura and Sasuke were created by Masashi Kishimoto. The rest of the story however is mine.

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><p>.<p>

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_This story started in the summer and ended before the next summer came fully, or maybe it has started way before that. _

_This is a story about me and my bestfriend, and a girl, of a year I would never forget. It's a story about life, friendship, but most of all love._

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><p>I was silently cursing Naruto for the predicament I was in right now.<p>

It was our last summer before we start our senior year in high school and before preparing for college but he had to go to the US with his mom. I'm too proud to admit it but life was boring without him around. I had no idea how to spend the start of my summer alone.

I was hitting the streets of Tokyo, playing videogames in our favourite arcade and looking up new releases of our favourite mangas. I should be doing this with Naruto as we've planned but he exchanged me for a trip to the US. Not that I blame him though, he told me he'd be visiting a hospital there with his okaa-san. Must be serious I thought, but hoping it was not too serious.

We've been bestfriends since we were 7. Having the surnames Uchiha and Uzumaki, we were alphabetically seatmates. We didn't hit it off right away though. I was a know-it-all snob and Naruto was an annoying loudmouth.

I was always number one in class and bested Naruto at everything. He always kept on trying to beat me though even if he always came second. He declared us rivals so I called him loser. To me being second place was just another word for first loser. Then he called me a bastard and that was when fists flew.

I have always been sensitive about being called a bastard because I am one. I never minded my otou-san always gone and not spending time with us because I thought then that he was busy with work, not until I saw him happily playing in the park with a boy who looked like me but older. I asked my okaa-san about it and I learned that my mother, Mikoto, was my father's mistress. I was the bastard son of Uchiha Fugaku who lived with his first family and first born son, Itachi.

So excuse me for being sensitive about the topic. It also hurt that otou-san never seemed interested about my activities and grades in school, because Itachi always came first. Next to Itachi, I always felt second best.

Our parents got called and it turned out our mothers knew each other in high school. So really, we were forced to socialize with each other. It wasn't long after that our rivalry turned to friendship. No one else really talked to me except Naruto. It must also be because he was an only child and had no one to play and fight with so we developed a brother-like bond. We were the only ones allowed to call each other loser and bastard but in a fond sort of way. We shared secrets and our stuff. He told me he'd even share his otou-san with me. We often have the same likes and dislikes, except perhaps with regards to ramen and tomatoes.

Not to brag or anything, we were also both considered one of the best-looking in our class. Between the two of us, Naruto was the friendly one, always accommodating and ready with a smile and hello. His disposition is as sunny as his bleached blond locks and bright as his blue eyes. It's no wonder girls flock him. I was the dark one with my black hair and eyes and impassive nature. I was better known as ice prince. I don't know why girls think I'm cool and mysterious when I don't even talk to them.

But both of us were serious with our studies and had no time for girls, or rather no girl has caught our attention yet. However, Naruto was the one always going on about finding the girl of his dreams. He was the one excited to fall in love.

Me, I was always a little wary of love. I'm scared to be like my okaa-san, so in love with my father but sharing his love with another. Just like how I had to content myself with the time my father gives me.

The closest father figure I have in my life next to Naruto's father would be our neighbour Kakashi. He lived alone and had a patch over his left eye. It was rumoured that he used to play baseball and lost his pregnant wife in a car accident while he was the one driving. He was the only one that survived though he lost an eye from the broken glass. In one night he lost his family and career that was why he drowned his sorrows with sake. He taught me how to ride a bike when he saw me fall several times in front of his yard and he would take me in to watch over when okaa-san was busy. He also taught Naruto and me how to play baseball. We never talked about it but I think there was some truth about the rumors.

But even then Kakashi didn't stay long. His liver failed and I was the only one aside from my mother and Naruto to visit him. I was beside him when he passed away. After his funeral, his lawyer came and read his will that I was to receive all of his savings and property when I turn 18. I didn't care for his money, I would miss the old man and how he treated me like his own son.

So who would blame me for being cautious and on guard? After all, it's my heart I'm trying to protect.

It was turning out to be a hot summer. I could feel my hair sticking to my sweaty neck. It was almost 4pm and I better head home before it gets dark. I went for the train station and got suddenly swamped by the rush of people also on their way home.

Fuck! I silently cursed Naruto again, hoping he was having a better time than me.

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><p>.<p>

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We've just arrived in the US, to visit a famous hospital. We were hoping, my okaa-san and I for a second opinion. We were inside a cab on the way to the hospital when my mother experienced one of her headaches.

I handed her medicine, worried. "Okaa-san, here take this." I said.

"Arigatou, Naruto-kun. I shouldn't be bothering you." She said.

"It's okay, kaa-san, it's okay." I reassured her. I was silently enjoying the foreign scenery, hoping I could tell all of it to Sasuke when I get back.

I was anxious and nervous as to what will happen when we get to the hospital. I wish Sasuke was here to distract me with his sarcastic remarks or just bonk me in the head to help me focus, just like when we were children when we would go to the dentist and I would panic.

Between the two of us he was always the tough one. He didn't cry when he fell from a tree when we were 12 and broke his wrist, not even when his otou-san finally left them when we were 13. I think he had stopped crying when Kakashi died when we were 11.

I was thinking of what Sasuke was doing now, hoping he was having a better time than me.


	2. Starting school while holding my breath

Summer's over.

It was the start of senior year.

I was kind of excited to see Naruto again, not that I'd tell him. We were not able to see each other yesterday, after he had just come back, but he called to say we'd meet at school and tell me everything. I also said I have some news for him. He sounded tired so I agreed, so he could get some rest.

I was getting impatient waiting by the benches at the back of the school near the baseball field. It was still 15 minutes before the bell and the back-to-school assembly starts. I was lost into thinking what could be keeping him and anxious of what happened with their visit in the US.

Then I saw him smiling as he approached me, a huge eat-shitting grin plastered on his face as if ramen was suddenly announced as the menu for lunch. It's ridiculous, I know, Naruto and his love of ramen, even calling it the food of the gods. Ramen is about one of the few things that he likes and I don't care much about.

"You look like you have really good news, loser. Are they serving ramen for lunch?" I teased him.

"Hello to you too, bastard!" He said before continuing. "But I hope they do. Anyway, you wouldn't believe it!"

"Believe what?" I asked with an eyebrow shooting up.

"I met a girl!" He proclaimed.

"So?" I asked. "Last night, you said you were going to tell me what happened in the US. Now you met a girl? Is your okaa-san, okay?"

A sudden streak of unease was etched on his face but was gone in an instant. I also noticed that he lost some weight. But maybe it was just because he was deprived of ramen in the US.

"Okaa-san's doing fine. Nothing serious and nothing to worry much about." He said, smiling a little.

"I'm glad to hear she's okay. And I'm glad you don't have to worry about her." I said in relief.

"So what about this girl?" I asked curious who the girl could be.

"I think she's new. I haven't seen her here before. I bumped into her as I was going to my locker, and she helped me pick-up my books. She is beautiful on top of being nice. She had pink streaks in her hair and her eyes! Oh you should see them! And her lips! The way she smiles could make your heart flutter. And she's going to be a senior like us. I hope we'll be classmates. I think I'm already in love!" He gushed like a lovesick puppy.

"Are you finished with your monologue?" I asked. All the talk about this girl is making me curious. Could a girl be that irresistible, to make Naruto sound even cornier than usual?

"Yeah, yeah, I'm stopping now. You'd find out for yourself." He said.

"How?" I asked.

"Because I invited her to follow me here, so I could introduce him to my bestfriend." He said.

"Wait, there she is. We're here!" He hollered.

A petite girl with shoulder length layered black hair with pink highlights on the fringes approached us. She had a doll like face and startling green eyes that would capture anyone's attention. I would bet that she had foreign blood.

"Haruno Cerise, meet my bestfriend, Uchiha Sasuke." Naruto introduced us.

I was holding my breath, not because I was mesmerized by her. That too, but because my bestfriend has said he loved her.


	3. Dibs and holding hands

"Cerise, just call him Sasuke and Sasuke, just call her Cerise, okay?" Naruto said.

"Nice to meet you, Sasuke." She said in accented japanese as she offered her hand for me to shake. She was definitely raised with western customs.

"You too." I said as I awkwardly shook her hand.

"So Cerise, why did you transfer school during senior year?" Naruto asked.

"My family moved to Japan from France last year because of my dad's work. I had a private tutor to catch up so I could join school this year." Cerise answered.

I was wondering what the pink streaks in her hair was for.

"Why do you have pink streaks in your hair?" Naruto asked, as if reading my thoughts.

"Actually, I'm more of a redhead with some blonde mixed in that my hair would look pink when left in the sun for long. But since transferring here, I was worried my hair would stick out so I colored it black but then I got into cosplays that one of my new friends introduced me to last summer and I realized weird hair was in so I thought why not?" She said and absently fingered her hair.

"It looks good on you." Naruto praised.

She did look good, different but good. I was silent all this time observing her, letting her and Naruto carry the conversation.

Just then the bell rang, and we went to the assembly.

It was just our luck that we found out that all of us were classmates. I was seated on Naruto's right and Cerise was seated in front of Naruto, diagonal to me.

The classes went on as usual, until it was lunchtime, and we all headed to the cafeteria. Cerise followed Naruto and me.

I hung back a little watching Naruto and Cerise talk, wondering whether we'd exist as a trio starting today. It bothers me and is made even more bothersome that other boys were eyeing Cerise and that the girls who follow Naruto and I were also eyeing her.

Cerise went ahead and saved our usual table for us. Naruto and I went in line to get our food.

"Oh! I forgot to ask you. What were you supposed to tell me last night?" He asked.

"Oh that. Nothing much, I was just going to ask how your summer went. I was just excited that you're back." I said.

"Whatever bastard, I missed you too, especially when we were in the hospital. I was bored out of my mind." Naruto said.

"Like I'll believe you, loser. You were probably scared out of your wits." I mocked him.

"But I'm okay with things now." He said seriously. "Although far-fetched, I was sort of hoping you'd tell me you met a girl last summer."

"Well I did." I said unsure whether to continue.

"Really? Has the ice prince found his princess?" He teased.

"Typical Naruto to think like that." I thought.

"Maybe you could double date with me and Cerise" He said.

"Oh? Have you asked her?" I asked doubtfully.

"Not yet, but soon. I think this is it Sasuke. She's the one I've been waiting for." Naruto said, sounding sure of himself.

"Good for you then." I said, unsure. Naruto must really be into her to say that.

"So what does your princess look like?" He asked.

"Pink." I said, thinking of her.

"Pink? Pink what? Like her dress? Nail polish? Lipgloss? Hair? How'd you meet her then?" He asked, when I refused to answer.

"The first day of summer, on the train." I said, recalling the memory.

"So what's her name?" He persisted asking.

"Sakura." I replied evasively.

"So you met a pink girl named Sakura last summer? Are you making this up?" Naruto asked amused.

"Have I ever lied to you? Just leave it alone." I said, as we approached Cerise.

Naruto sat across from her while I was forced to sit beside her when Naruto spilled his drink on the seat beside him as he sat down. He handed out our drinks and the sandwiches.

"Too bad, no ramen and I just spilled my soda." Naruto complained, which made us all laugh.

Cerise was kind enough to give him her drink saying she doesn't drink soda anyway and preferred water or juice.

As we were eating, I noticed Naruto would steal glances at Cerise and smile while they talked about what to expect senior year.

Out of the blue, Cerise's hand reached out and held mine under the table. I was surprised with what she did but I tried to keep it low. I did not want Naruto to know. I tried to free my hand but she only held on so I squeezed her hand hard to let her drop mine. She did not even flinch, instead she smiled at me.

I was eating my sandwich one-handed and so was she. Naruto did not seem to notice.

The bell rang signalling lunch was over and I quickly let go of her hand. We headed back to class, and on went the lectures.

I was looking at Naruto who was busy looking at Cerise while Cerise was focused on the lesson.

I was wondering where all of this is heading. The school year has just started but I was already missing summer.


	4. A girl on the train

_Being tall and lanky has its disadvantages especially when you're on a commuter train during rush hour. I was pushed to the far side of the train, my back against the glass. I was trying hard to prevent myself from getting crushed by the incoming passengers. _

_I was busy observing the other passengers as the train filled up, watching couples whisper to each other, holding hands, having their sweet moments. I sometimes wonder whether I'll ever become one of them, a PDA couple. But being an ice prince and having no sweet bone in my body, it was probably a not ever thing._

_On the next stop, a wave of passengers entered and I was suddenly aware that a girl probably around my age, though I wasn't sure because of her much shorter stature, was pushed to stand in front of me. She had long pink hair and was wearing a kimono style top over her shorts. I never really noticed girls before, not even the supposed pretty ones in our class, but her presence seemed to beckon my attention._

_She must have felt me staring and looked up at me. The instant she looked up, I felt my breath catch. _

_She didn't look Japanese, in fact I could see that she was a foreigner. She had smooth porcelain skin with a blush to her cheeks, her pink lips curved into a half-smile and she had the most unbelievable doe eyes and those eyes were on me. _

_I don't know how long we held each others' stare but suddenly another wave of passengers entered and pushed her towards me. _


	5. The Third Wheel

Everyday I see that Cerise and Naruto were becoming closer. Naruto was finally able to ask Cerise for a date. I was unable to come with the girl I liked so Naruto just asked me to tag along as a third wheel.

We decided to watch a movie. It was a horror film. We sat inside the moviehouse with Cerise sitting in between us.

The movie was scary but I knew Naruto was a bigger scaredy cat than me, giving out screams and gasps. I saw her holding on to Cerise's arm and burying his face on her shoulder.

I got a little spooked myself but not like Naruto. I would jump a little in my seat and feel my heart race. Suddenly I felt Cerise's hand on mine. She intertwined her fingers with mine. I did not want to let go of her hand this time. It was a good thing that the moviehouse was dark and Naruto could not see us.

When the movie ended, I let go of her hand, afraid that Naruto will see. He likes Cerise too much. I did not want to make him jealous.

We dined out in a ramen bar. Naruto was too happy as he ordered a big bowl of pork miso. After dinner, Naruto excused himself to go to the men's room. I was left alone in our table with Cerise and I was suddenly feeling awkward and uncomfortable.

"Did you like the movie?" She asked.

"Sort of." I replied.

"Which part did you like?" She asked again.

"The ending. I was glad when it was over." I tried to make a joke. "How about you?"

"The scary parts." She answered.

"Why?" I started to ask but then I remembered.

I realized it was the time Naruto was screaming and clinging on to her and she was holding my hand. Just then, Naruto returned and it was time to go home.

Naruto lived on the other side of town but he had to first take Cerise home. I bid them goodbye and boarded the bus towards home alone.


	6. Liking a girl last summer

_It was a fruitful summer after all. I met a girl I could more than tolerate for extended periods and quite possibly really like. I don't want to jinx it yet. But I cannot deny the strong pounding in my heart I feel for her and the flutter I feel in my guts, and the need to stare into those eyes and lose myself. _

_Could I sound any mushier? Kill me now. _

_Don't get me wrong. I was still an ice prince only a little less icy but I might just have found a princess._

_She was not like the other girls I know of, I have come to learn as we spent most of the summer together. She was smart and bookish and cared little of her looks most of the time even if she was the prettiest girl I have seen by far. _

_On our first meeting after getting off the train, I stayed with her until she got home, accompanying her until she boarded the bus and walking with her up to her house. We talked on the way and got to know each other. It surprised me how easy it was to talk to her and open up some things about me like how she did with me._

_She had been adopted by her Japanese parents. Her birth mother was French while her father was Irish. They died in an accident when she was four. Since her adoptive parents were friends with them and had no kids of their own, they decided to adopt her._

_And it just happened that they moved here almost a year ago and lived 4 blocks away from my house. I didn't know she lived nearby, but maybe it was fate that we only met now. She had private classes having switched houses in the middle of the school year. She will be a senior like Naruto and I when she starts school this year._

_Speaking of Naruto, how will I tell my bestfriend about her? _

_I was a little embarrassed to introduce her to him. I haven't been known to notice girls at all. But he's my bestfriend and he should know. I'll just cross the bridge when I get there I thought, savoring the feeling of summer, of being young and liking a girl._


	7. My secret to keep

We started out the three of us rather awkwardly, but later on we have gotten to know each other better and gotten used to each other. Even the other kids in our class have stopped gossiping about us. Everyone seems to have accepted that Cerise, Naruto and I were now inseparable.

There was an upcoming dance at our school. I was dreading this dance, not sure how I am ever going to ask the girl I like. Naruto decided that this will be an opportunity to ask Cerise and confess his feelings. I wanted to tell Naruto it was not a good idea but he seemed so hopeful that I do not want to see him get hurt.

It has been 3 months since Cerise and Naruto started going out albeit casually. And Naruto still isn't sure what Cerise felt for him. I don't know what to tell him. I was afraid for my own secret.

I have been meeting the girl I like secretly. We started seeing each other in the summer. I was pleasantly surprised that she transferred to our school. But I acted differently around her in school, afraid that if everyone finds out, the happy bubble around me will burst.

I did not even tell Naruto. I know this must be big if I am hiding it from him, because he will be the first person to get hurt once he finds out that his bestfriend was keeping secrets.

This secrecy was putting a lot of strain in our relationship. She wanted everyone to find out but I asked her to wait. She was getting tired of sneaking around and pretending. I was getting tired too but I wanted to fix things first.

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We were hanging out at her house after class. Her parents were away on business and I was sitting on her bed in her room admiring its cleanliness and order.

She sat beside me, looking serious.

"When will you ask me out to the dance?" She asked suddenly.

"You know, it's impossible." I said.

"Why? I don't care what the other people would say. Other boys are already asking me out and I refused them. I only want to go with you." She pleaded.

"I know, but if only circumstances were different." I said.

"Are you really this icy? Don't you care how I feel?" She asked rather bluntly.

It hurt me what she said. It was just never in my personality to be showy. "I care a lot about you, about us but I also care about what others will say about you and about me." I said, hoping she believed me.

"I don't care about the others!" She said angrily. "You're my boyfriend and I feel like you're taking me for granted." She said.

I was dreading that this will start another fight just like before when I asked her a big favor.

"I love you." She said, softly this time.

Those 3 words always gave me comfort. She's always been sweet to me only I can't return the affection. I don't know what's wrong with me. Was I really as frozen as ice? I must be too scared to admit what I feel because if I do everything will be real. I was afraid of getting hurt.

"I know." I said. I gazed into her intense eyes, the familiar feeling of getting lost in them never getting old.

I leaned onto her and she leaned back falling into her bed. My arms were supporting my weight over her, preventing me from crushing her.

I recalled the first time I met her last summer just before she smiled and claimed my lips.


	8. A girl on the train 2

_I turned our positions around so her back was pressed against the train's glass with my hands placed on both sides of her to support my weight from crushing her. But our position right now was hardly appropriate for strangers. We were caught somewhere between leaning and hugging. I don't like PDAs but here I am caught in an almost embrace._

_My arms were bent on both sides of her rubbing against her shoulders, her face inches from my neck and my head was hovering above her distractingly pink hair. The backs of her hands and arms were touching against my chest and abdomen where she has folded them in front of her. Her face was turned to the side of my neck and I could feel every exhale of her warm breath. Her hair smelled like cherry blossoms and vanilla, a deadly combination of sweetness and something extraordinarily her._

_I was feeling warm all of a sudden from her nearness and from the blush I feel creeping upon my neck. I was suddenly conscious whether I smelled nice as well. I looked down to smell myself when I was offered the sight of her cleavage from the V-neck of her kimono. I cursed inwardly and felt myself blushing further. _

_This warm feeling was melting my ice prince attitude and I was suddenly troubled. I shook my head to clear it but somehow I found myself gasping when I felt her lips graze the junction between my neck and shoulder. Oh shit!_

_I heard her give a restrained giggle. "Do you allow girls to kiss you on the first meeting?" She spoke with an accent looking up to me amused._

_"__Who does she think she is?" I thought meeting her gaze with a cold stare, the ice prince back. _

_"__You smell nice." She said, her gaze softening and her lips curving into a smile._

_I had no idea how to answer her and kept staring at her. I've never met a girl this blunt and straightforward. _

_"__I don't mind kissing you, but did you know one more kiss and you're mine?" She whispered almost like a promise._

_Was she playing with me? I do not respond well to taunts. I was not backing down. Not me. I have never backed down from anything. _

_Another set of passengers entered and pushed me towards her as I tried to brace myself against the glass. I felt her raise herself on tiptoes placing her hands on my shoulders. I saw her smile before her lips were suddenly on mine. _

_It was a soft long kiss. I felt warm all over and my heart was pounding hard inside my chest. When the kiss ended, I opened my eyes to meet her bright orbs, not even remembering I closed it. I licked my lips and they tasted like cherries._

_No words were needed. _

_It was not a surrender but rather a recognition of the heart. _

_I was hers._


	9. My secret to keep 2

We were lying on her bed. She was using my chest for a pillow, listening to the beating of my heart. I often wondered why she says it relaxes her. My arm was draped over her while my other hand was busy playing with the locks of her hair.

I was still a little dazed from our impromptu make-out session. She's been pushy these days and I can't blame her. I was anxious because I was going to ask her to do something she won't like again.

"Will you do me a favour?" I asked tentatively.

"Sure, what is it?" She asked.

"Will you go out with my friend to the dance?" I said.

I felt her stiffen beside me. She pushed me away from her, turning her back on me.

"I don't want to. Do you really want me to be with him?" She asked.

"Of course not, but I don't want him to get hurt. I'm waiting for the right time to tell him." I said.

She turned towards me to face me. "Promise me this, you will never ask me again to date another guy. I'm just like any other girl. I don't want my feelings for you to get confused." She said looking serious.

"I don't mind. I'm not the jealous type, not when it comes to him anyway. Besides it's just pretend right?" I was waiting for her reply, wanting her to reassure me.

"Well you should be. Do you think I don't feel bad knowing what I'm doing is technically cheating? Sometimes I don't know whether it's pretend anymore. He's a really nice guy and it's not that hard to like him when my own boyfriend is being a cold-hearted ass." She said angrily.

**"**Are you starting to like him?" I asked, steeling myself for her answer.

"Sometimes." She said, looking away from me.

"Do you wish you were with him instead of me?" I asked again, waiting for her answer.

"No! Of course not. But if you keep on pushing me to him, I'm afraid of what will happen." She confessed.

"Thank you for being honest with me. I promise to do everything I can to prevent that from happening." I said as I stared into her eyes, wanting her to believe me. Of course I don't want to lose her to him.

She hugged me close pressing her face to my chest.

"I love you, Sasuke-kun." She whispered.

I felt reassured with her words and with her familiar scent engulfing me.

"Sakura." I whispered back my pet name for her.

Because she had pink hair like the anime character the first day I met her, because she smelled like cherry blossoms and tasted like cherries, because it was the Japanese name she was given but never used.

This is my secret to keep. My girlfriend is Haruno Cerise and I've been asking her to date my bestfriend, Naruto.

Naruto announced dibs on before I could tell him about her so I kept quiet, hiding our relationship in school. I didn't think it was a bad idea at first. I was hoping Naruto will get over her and realize it was just an infatuation. But I'm now going to put a stop to it. I don't ever want to lose Sakura and I don't want to hurt Naruto more than necessary.

I did not know then that I spoke too soon about my promise.


	10. Boy-scented bus rides

_I hated having to move house, a different country and continent at that, and to make it worse, just before the last year of my highschool._

_I have to ride the bus to attend a private tutorial class on the other side of town so I could catch up for my senior year. _

_My adoptive parents have decided to move back to their home country for dad's business, but they haven't given a thought to my situation. They just told me that I could enrol in the nearest high school next schoolyear and that they'd enrol me for now under a tutor so I could improve my Japanese and catch up on their curriculum._

_"__Are they kidding me?" I thought. "Who transfers school in the middle of the year?"_

_It's not the language or cultural barrier that annoys me or the fact that they have a different academic system. I was told often enough that I was smart. It was the fact that I don't have friends in a foreign land, which I dislike._

_I was still a little miffed about my parents as much as I loved them when I rode the bus that day. I wore my hoodie over my head and stuffed my ears with my Ipod. Suddenly I had a whiff of something smelling nice, or rather someone. _

_Smells like soap and something distinctively like a boy, I thought, and realized it was from the guy who had just sat beside me. _

_He was cute, no scratch that, he was beautiful. He had the face like those seen in mangas and animes, with his fine features and pale skin in contrast with his dark hair. He also emitted this cool dark and untouchable persona with his furrowed brows and scowl lost in concentration over his book. He looked around my age and wore those cute high school uniforms that I've noticed were popular here. I kind of liked the idea of wearing one of those cute high school girl uniforms myself. I was about to look away when I noticed the badge in his uniform was the school my parents wanted me to go to next year. _

_"__Was this a sign?" I thought._

_He looked so aloof and mysterious, like a puzzle that the idea of transferring to his school was suddenly appealing. Maybe it would be nice to meet and get to know him._

_He got down on the next stop and I was a little disappointed to see him go. He did not even look up and notice me._

_Everyday since then, I would wait for him to board the bus at exactly 6:00am.I always try to reserve the seat beside me for him. He'd sit and start to read a book, sometimes it's his books in class like english, science, history. Other times, He'd be reading novels and mangas. _

_He'd go on that way, unmindful of his surrounding and of me. I have deduced that he was either sociophobic or outrightly indifferent. I could go on looking at him, unnoticed, with his image filling me. _

_By 6:30, he'd be gone on his stop, leaving me with the lingering scent that was uniquely him._


	11. A boy on the train

_In the few weeks since I've been here, I've made new friends who've introduced me to cosplaying. And I have to admit that dressing up in cute attires was kind of fun and different that what kids did back home. I was dressed like one of those ninja characters in this popular anime and my hair looked just right for the character._

_It was crowded as I caught the afternoon train. The rush of people going home was too much and I felt myself get pushed deeper into the train with every stop. _

_I suddenly had a whiff of something familiar. I looked up and noticed him staring at me. It was him, the boy on the bus. Finally, he noticed me. _

_I smiled a half-smile and stared right back at him. I wondered what he thought of me. Oh God! What does he think of my pink hair?_

_I don't know how long we held each other's stare but suddenly another wave of passengers entered and I felt myself get pushed towards him._

_He turned our positions around so that my back was pressed against the train's glass and he was facing me with his hands on either side of me pushing against the glass so as not to crush me. I folded my arms in front of my chest with the backs of my arms and hands grazing his abdomen and chest. My face was angled to his neck that I could freely inhale his scent. _

_He was a head taller than me such that from his vantage point he could probably see down my top. I felt my cheeks blush. I should be offended by his proximity but I wasn't. I was excited and thrilled to be this close to him. I have never met a boy I wanted to be this close to._

_Then he suddenly shook his head which somehow brought his neck closer to me brushing against my lips. I heard him gasp which caused me to giggle. Asian boys were so different from boys back home. I wondered if he'd ever been kissed._

_"__Do you allow girls to kiss you on the first meeting?" I asked brazenly, staring up at him._

_He looked at me coldly but I only felt warmer under his intense dark eyes._

_"__You smell nice." I said, trying to lighten up the situation and offering him a smile._

_But he still hasn't moved or said anything and kept on staring at me. I thought that maybe I could have a little fun and tease him so he'd react or something._

_"__I don't mind kissing you, but did you know one more kiss and you're mine?" I whispered. _

_But still this boy looked like he was made of stone. An idea popped into my head to soften him towards me just as another set of passengers rushed in. _

_I raised myself on tiptoes and placed my hands over his shoulders. I smiled at him just as I pressed my lips to his._

_It was just supposed to be a peck on the lips but kissing him was unlike the kisses I've had before. Kissing him was like kissing for the first time and I felt like I've never been properly kissed. I was almost unwilling to let go but I did not want to push my luck. When the kiss ended, I opened my eyes to meet his. _

_I'm not sure what it was I saw in his eyes but he seemed to have changed his opinion of me. He licked his lips slowly and my breath caught the way he did it. And for the first time, I saw him smile._

_It was then that I knew._

_I was in love with a boy on the train on the first day of summer._


	12. Unexpected

The dance was a week away. I was going to tell Naruto about Sakura and I, that she'll be my date because she was my girlfriend. I was waiting for him by his locker but he never came.

The class already started and still he was missing. I was busy glancing at his empty seat wondering why he was absent.

Sakura was also looking behind her, probably thinking the same. She looked at me with question in her eyes and I just shrugged my shoulders.

It was not like Naruto to be absent. We were both grade-conscious and had almost perfect attendance in school except for the time I broke my wrist and the time he had chickenpox.

He wasn't even absent last school year when He was having headaches. I was suddenly plagued with fear that something must be wrong. Maybe it's Kushina-san. I decided to come to his house later that afternoon.

Sakura and I were having lunch together. It was weird having lunch with her alone, without Naruto. I felt the other students staring at us, probably wondering why we were eating stiffly and hardly talking.

I could not help it if I was acting strange around her. Eversince school started I could not get her to myself except in secret.

"What are you thinking, Sasuke-kun?" She asked.

"I'm worried about Naruto. He has never been absent before without reason. Something must be wrong." I said, worry etching my usual stoic face.

"Is it okay if I go to his house later?" I asked, trying to cancel our date.

"Sure, if you want I'll come with you." She offered.

"Thanks but I think I'll go alone. And Sakura, is it okay if I don't tell him yet about us?" I pleaded, hoping she'll understand.

"I understand. But make it soon okay?" She said.

In the midst of everyone in the cafeteria, Sakura placed her hand near mine with the tips of our fingers touching. It was not exactly the sweetest gesture in the world but it was enough for me. I told myself that we will only have to wait a while before we could hold hands freely and before I could tell everyone she is mine.

* * *

><p>I went to Naruto's house and rang their bell. His mom came out and opened the door.<p>

"Oh Sasuke! Come in" she said, looking surprised.

"Kushina-san, you look well." I said, surprised to see his okaa-san, up and about.

"Is Naruto home? I was wondering why he was absent. I even brought my notes." I said.

"He had one of his headache attacks this morning and the doctor advised that he rest." She said sounding anxious.

"Is it something serious? I asked, worried that something was bothering Naruto and was not telling me.

"Haven't he told you yet?" She asked again, worried that she said too much.

"Told me what?" I was beginning to feel as if I'm trapped in some sort of drama with all the suspense. Naruto hiding something from me as I was hiding something from him too.

"I think I better let him tell you." She said

I entered Naruto's bedroom and saw the familiar orange walls. I don't know why he chose the loud color but it fit his personality.

I saw him in his bed sitting propped on his pillows reading some book. He looked a little pale but he smiled when he saw me.

"Hey." I said returning his smile as I sat down beside his bed. "I brought my notes and our assignment for tomorrow."

"Thanks, man, for always being a good friend, not just a good friend but a brother." He said with a tint of sadness in his voice.

"What are you thanking me for?" I asked, perplexed and anxious where this conversation was heading.

"I'm sorry for misleading you into thinking kaa-san was sick and for not telling you sooner." He started to apologize.

"Tell me what?" I asked, confused yet dreading what was to follow.

"I have a brain tumor."

He said it calmly; as if he were talking about the weather or was reciting answers in class.

It was not the answer I was expecting.

I already feared the implications of what he said.


	13. How it all started that summer 2

_When we got to the hospital, we were received by a nurse who told us to proceed to the 5__th__ floor, their neurosurgery section. _

_We entered the elevator and my mind was soon preoccupied._

_I was nervous of what the doctor will say. I was holding all my medical records inside a folder along with my scans. _

_My kaa-san reached out for my hand and squeezed it, letting me know she's there. I'm thankful of her coming with me and going through this. She's also even suffering headaches from all the stress. _

_I wished Sasuke could be here too, but I haven't told him yet. I'm too scared. Telling him would be painful and would mean it's final._

_I was praying silently, wishing that the doctor could offer me some hope. _

_Upon reaching the 5__th__ floor, the nurse got my records and asked us to wait. We sat at the waiting area and I saw other patients as well. They were a mixture of ages, old and young, while I was somewhere in between._

_I saw an old man around 60s who had a bandage around his head. I wondered what happened to him. What was he sick for and how long does he have to live?_

_There was middle-aged woman with a cervical collar talking to her companion about a laminectomy. I wondered what that was and whether it hurt._

_I also saw a boy less than a year-old. His mother was holding him on her lap and his big head was bobbing. At least I recognize this one. I think he has hydrocephalus, the poor baby. _

_On my right, I see a little girl playing with her doll and smiling happily. She could've been pretty with her dimpled smile if only she did not have that lump protruding from her forehead. I wondered what it was called._

_Looking at them, I must have been the most normal-looking patient waiting here. But they don't know I was hiding a tumor in my brain._

_I was called by the nurse and ushered in. _

_We were greeted by the doctor who seemed very professional. I was hoping he'd give me some good news._

_But the doctor told me the same thing as my previous doctor. They said they wanted to admit me to do some more tests and see if I'm eligible for the new surgical procedure they are planning._

_It's been two months of tests and more meetings with different doctors. I felt drained from all of them. In the end, I was a poor candidate; the procedure was just too risky for me._

_I guess my prayer got lost somewhere. Hope was not on my side._

_As I was discharged from the hospital, I was able to see the little girl I saw before. She already had her operation. She smiled at me. She really had a beautiful smile. _

_Seeing her lifted me up. Hope sprung within me. _

_I decided not to waste my time sulking. Life is too short and my time was shorter._

_I wanted to live as if everyday was my last and leave no room for regrets; to seize life and fill my days with only happy memories._

_I have accepted my fate. _

_I just have to tell Sasuke and the rest of the world._


	14. Life strikes a balance

I was shocked, not expecting something like this. "When did you know?" I managed to ask.

"Last year before school ended when I started having those headaches. That's why we went to the States, to get a second opinion and hopefully find cure. It's small but its location makes it very difficult to operate. Surgery could cure me or kill me. But either way if the tumor gets any bigger it could compress on the part of my brain which controls breathing. So yeah, either way I could be dead." He said calmly.

I wanted to shout at him for not telling me, to scream at him for sounding so clinical about it. But I couldn't, he was my bestfriend, my brother. And if this is the way he wanted to deal with it I wouldn't stop him.

"How long have you got?" I asked, hoping he had time.

"When I was first diagnosed they told me that it would depend how fast the tumor will grow." he said.

I did not know it but then tears were leaking from my eyes. Naruto reached out for my face and wiped them.

"I did not know you could still cry." He said.

I did not know either. I was looking at him, afraid that his time was running out even as we talk. He seemed to have read my mind.

"Everyone dies, Sasuke. My timing just sucks." He said, and just as suddenly, he broke down.

I was again feeling the heat coming from my eyes, so I cried with him. I hugged him and patted his back. After a while he was pacified.

I don't know how to ease his pain but I wanted to never see him cry again. I promised to myself that I will try all I could to make his days happy.

.

.

.

I was going home thinking about Naruto, about me, about life and where we fit in the grander scheme of things. Naruto was a good person, he never hurt anyone, why was life unfair?

I remember Kakashi once told me that life always strikes a balance. I always thought that it was about good and bad. But now I think I understand it better.

I felt a tilt in the balance between Naruto, Sakura and I.

As painful as it is, I know what I must do.

For life to be fair to someone, it has to be unfair to another.

I must share Sakura with Naruto, to make him happy even if it hurts me, even if by doing so I risk losing her.


End file.
